Cuck gay

But since, on one level, we’re all animals, such a fantasy is definitely comprehensible. Since, traditionally, a cuckold is someone to be looked down upon, or made fun of, why would a man’s imagining his wife’s cheating on him—or his actually offering her to another male—be anything that could sexually excite him?

Happily for Dan, who now runs a popular Twitter account and OnlyFans dedicated to cucking, these feelings of anxiety or humiliation are easily compartmentalised. My sole concern here is examining what motivates these illicit fantasies. For they break free of all boundaries, to reach what we might call the “thrilling, pure bliss of id.”

What Could Be More Arousing Than What Society Frowns Upon—or Is Taboo?!

Elaborating on the above, here we’re focusing on the magnetic appeal of the outrageous.

Although I’ll be taking my cue from David Ley in elucidating the various motivating factors in a man’s fantasizing his wife—or, though far less often, his girlfriend—as engaging in sex with another man, I won’t also be considering, as does Ley, those instances where the imagined scenario actually takes place. Confused or embarrassed by such proclivities, they frequently wish they weren’t so turned on by the idea of being cuckolded.

There is something reassuring in knowing that life goes back to normal.”

Cucking, gay or straight, can be considered a way of eroticising male anxieties; the bull (the third party who becomes involved with cuckold couples) becomes a blank canvas upon which all sorts of insecurities are projected. When it comes down to it, not many kinks are progressive (our grubbiest desires tend not to align perfectly with our politics) and cuckolding is no exception.

Is he turned on by the woman’s heightened sensual pleasure ... The rest of the time they get laid with strangers.”

This, it has to be said, doesn’t sound a world away from present day Hackney. “As painful and unpleasant as the experience was, there were also some undeniable feelings of lust and curiosity,” he tells me.

Maybe this is because cuckolding is at least partly based on some old-fashioned ideas of male ownership of women, along with the idea that non-monogamy is transgressive. Unquestionably, there’s a great deal of ego involvement here. A great deal, perhaps even the majority, of straight cuck porn is couched in dehumanising myths about black men – usually related to sexual prowess and/or dick size – and unfortunately this is evident in gay porn, too.

And this may be a lot more descriptive of men in their 30s, 40s, and beyond than in those whose "hormonal itch" is so strong that they feel compelled to complete the act as soon as possible.

A man’s vicariously being turned on by vividly picturing the inordinate pleasure his partner is experiencing by displaying her own most primitive sexual impulses and being forcefully "taken" by another male might be understood as a kind of “surrogate sexing.” Additionally, the graphic portrayal of such unrestrained sensuality reflects a man’s most animalistic instincts.

This should be a great comfort to multitudes of men who in message boards all over the internet repeatedly ask whether these secret desires mean that they’re deviant—that there’s something essentially wrong with them. We exalt tops, and we shame bottoms. “Maybe this appeals to straights more than gays because we’ve been doing that forever and it doesn’t seem as taboo.”

In theory, this should mean cucking can’t have quite the same potency in a gay context, but – taboo or not – it’s clearly doing something for a lot of gay men at the moment.

Many men freely admit that in their lovemaking, getting their wives aroused through extended foreplay is every bit as exciting as their getting aroused themselves.

Obviously this is not the case. But perhaps looking at the specificities of gay cucking can tell us something about the anxieties of gay men.

“There are definitely some underlying worries,” Dan admits.

Afterwards, Dan found himself trying to recreate the whole scenario in his head, imagining how they would have met, what they would have spoken about, what positions they may have had sex in.

But how does a fetish based around ideas of patriarchal ownership and thwarted masculinity work in a gay context?

For many gay cucks, the fetish falls within a larger dom/sub dynamic with their partner – it’s about making the top feel doubly alpha and dominant. Still, most of the motivating factors for these common male fantasies may be viewed as celebrating a woman’s sexuality (and probably a man’s own as well!).